I wouldn't call the attitude that one ought to be able to get all the support one needs from one's partner, no matter what, healthy. That can lead to an entire category of relationship failure, I'd say.
> that's a fair point and that's not what i meant.
Apologies for the misunderstanding, then. Agree that keeping one's partner "in the loop", especially early on [edit: early on in seeking help for something, that is, not early on in the relationship], is generally advisable.
partners should be supportive of each other and they should work together to solve problems. but a solution can include bringing in outside help.
the point is that any approach to solve a problem starts with looking at that problem with your partner and together deciding the next steps