[ideonexus]

I have social anxiety disorder, which I deal with in the workplace by putting on a "Customer Service" persona. So in any interview, I consider the interviewer as my customer and I want to make them happy. In an interview for a previous job, the Lead Architect was very aggressively putting me through several technical questions and at one point he told me I was completely wrong in one of my answers. When I politely tried to explain why I believed my answer was correct and offered to demonstrate on my laptop, he got angry and stormed out of the interview, leaving his two embarrassed looking coworkers to continue.

It was a bad experience, but the other two interviewers were very nice and I really wanted to work for this non-profit, so I sent a follow-up email apologizing for upsetting the Lead Architect so much, saying that I thought it was just a misunderstanding, that there were multiple correct answers, and provided some documentation to further explain why I answered the way I did.

I got a job offer that afternoon, and two weeks after I started they fired the Lead Architect. That same week, I went out to lunch with the team, where one of the interviewers told everyone about how I made the Lead Architect look so stupid during the interview and that I was so incredibly nice about it that they knew they had to hire me. Turns out it was a workplace where everyone highly valued politeness and the Architect had been antagonizing and bullying everyone for years. Ended up being one of the friendliest places I've ever worked.

[quickthrower2]

Brilliant story. Lucky they had the balls to get rid of him, few companies would.

[shnock]

Thank you for sharing your story. I found it educational and will work to emulate some of your described behavior.

I bet that lunch made you feel great!

[lmas]

Aww man thanks a lot for your story! Kindness is really the only way to treat people, including yourself. And you totally owned it!

[permalac]

I think I will apply your train of thought in future interactions with difficult people.

Customer service persona, I like it.

[ipaddr]

The way you handled that should be taught. Great job it sounds like success will follow you wherever you go.

[xisukar]

What a nice turn of events! You literally killed the Lead Architect with kindness haha

[ask_b123]

As it says in the Bible (I'm not 100% sure what 'heap burning coals on his head' means):

«“If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.»

[andrei_says_]

It sounds like the incentive is still to “punish” the “enemy” - and that kindness is the worst punishment.

In other words, cause them suffering by being super nice to them.

Be nice with the intention to harm.

This is so twisted.

In my book kindness means literally wishing good from the depth of my heart.