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by gear_envy 1524 days ago
EDM KNIFE USER MANUAL

[From WEEB Corporation, the industry leader in melee weapons and cosplay supply]

Please keep all magical weapons pointed in a safe direction and out of the reach of children.

Step 1: Using aseptic technique, load the hilt chamber with concentrated liquid MDMA. Remember to wear gloves during this process!

Step 2: While the product is still sheathed, activate the EDM Knife’s special powers by performing the PLUR hand signs as if you were casting a Naruto jutsu.

The knife will begin emitting lights and a sick beat as soon as you draw it. This indicates that the weapon will now inflict a status ailment.

Step 3: Proceed to stab and/or slash your opponent(s). If you followed Steps 1 and 2 correctly, your wounded enemies will soon be rolling too hard to continue fighting.

*WEEB Corporation is not liable for any injury caused. Please contact customer support for any questions and concerns.