[troglodynellc]

Drop the therapy and start lifting weights. I'm not kidding.

If the problem is that you feel things are gonna be a slow decline from here, then fight it. Make that your new goal, even if you know it to be a losing battle. It will focus your mind on demonstrable milestones like hitting new deadlift personal best.

Even if you do something else, at the very least recognize that you've gotten to the point where you don't need to focus on the "work" and "money" part of life; as such treat this as an opportunity to focus on something new. After all, we only have a limited time on this earth to experience the things you want to do. This crisis is your mind's way of saying "I haven't done something I wished I had done." It isn't bad, it's just cognitive dissonance. Find the root of that dissonance and do that which would resolve the problems keeping you from finding fulfillment. This process will be emotionally painful but also cathartic.

Best of luck; know that every man has it within them to pull through this and come out the other end happy and fulfilled. So long as you are willing to question everything about why you are the way you currently are, you will eventually seek out the truths you need to proceed.

[weego]

Absolutely never under any circumstances attempt to take people away from their safety net, therapist or otherwise.

You have no understanding of their wider life and concerns, and people asking for big life change help can be surprisingly susceptible to advice.

[Trasmatta]

Every couple years some new trend pops up that people start claiming will fix everyone's mental health issues. One of the current ones seems to be weight lifting. I have no doubt it can be massively helpful for mental health for a lot of people, but it's awfully condescending and detached from reality when people show up say "lmao drop therapy, all you have to do is pick up heavy things".

[NhanH]

Does your statement apply to “get therapy” itself?

I’m not trying to be snarky, I’ve seen way more advices on getting therapy rather than start lifting weight. I don’t have an opinion one way or another, but when I read the GP advice, I thought it was the one being unusual rather than common

[Trasmatta]

If the claim is "just go to therapy once a week and you'll be cured", then I would say yes. Depression is multi faceted and there's no single solution. It would likewise be ridiculous for somebody to say "stop weight lifting, all you need is therapy".

[JMiao]

Yes, but the thing is, the right therapist might help with the self-reflection you're talking about in paragraph 3. "Therapy" isn't one thing.

[weakfish]

Absurd to ever suggest to a stranger that they stop therapy. You don’t know them. Awful, awful thing to do.

[angrycoder]

terrible advice, never tell someone who has depression or any other mental health issue to stop going to therapy.

[benatkin]

telling them to keep going to therapy would be equally good/bad advice

...unless you care to show me clear evidence that therapy is effective in aggregate

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/acps.12713

[svmegatron]

Better yet: keep going to therapy and start lifting weights!

[YuriNiyazov]

I thought "Therapy or Crossfit (though the skill tree allows you to choose only one)." from

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/a-scathing-review-of-you... was a joke until I read this comment.

[jawerty]

Ignore the other commenters this is good advice to give a man in a tough spot. If you find it yourself you'll be stronger. That's it. Life is tough and not fair, sometimes the people you rely on won't be there. The less dependent you are on others to get yourself out of a hole the better off you are.

[aarpmcgee]

Not sure about the suggestion to "drop the therapy"—if op's current therapy isn't helping so much, a different therapist/approach can make all the difference in the world. It took a lot of time for me to discover that kind of therapy worked best for me, and it also took some determination for me to find a therapist with whom I could really connect. My current therapist has helped me so much.

[throwaway13575]

If you do start lifting, I would recommend Starting Strength (Rippetoe). The 3x5 squats, deadlift, press routine got me out of a deep depression. It gave me life. I saw that the mind is supported by the body, and without health the mind is a turmoil.

[blipvert]

Woah, toxic masculinity alert!

By all means give weights (or running, cycling, whatever) a go, but stay with the therapy.

Better to listen to professionals rather than some rando on the web.

[vvvcccvvv]

No no no. Never tell someone you do not know to stop going to therapy. Please be careful

[_Microft]

> Drop the therapy

NEVER, EVER, suggest dropping therapy to someone with depression.

[getlawgdon]

Terrible suggestion. Full stop. OP: Do not stop therapy.