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by rottendoubt 5362 days ago
I was just having dinner with a female friend that was an EECS major (electrical engineering computer science) from UC Berkeley and she brought up another point. She said whenever she took classes and needed a partner, she'd always have guys come up to try to help her and that usually they were among the smartest guys in the class.

As far as the marriage/kids issue goes ... I think I read that the average age of the people at YCombinator is 26; and as far as my own observation goes, that's right around the time that my female friends started seriously thinking about the marriage/kids issue. I think the discrepancy is really driven by the biological clock. Men can have kids well into their 50's, but it's pretty dangerous for women to have kids past 40.
1 comments
jlees 5362 days ago
Well, anecdotes are anecdotes. I know plenty of women the same age as me (I'm 29) who also don't want kids any time soon, though more and more of us are getting married. I really don't know of any of the women I went to college with at undergrad or postgrad level having kids as young as 26, and only one that I can think of that has kids at 30.

Maybe I'm too much of an outlier, but to me, achieving my dreams is more important than having a kid, which has never been something I particularly prioritised in life. I have at least 5 more years before I really have to worry anyway. Plus, we're having babies long after 40 now.

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rottendoubt 5361 days ago
Oh, I agree. I'm the same way (I'm 37). It's just that differences in biology force women to consider the issue earlier than men. I'm guessing that societal pressure also plays a part as well -- ie. parents may push a woman at 30 to get married/have kids much harder than a man at 30.
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anthropeeps 5361 days ago
I don't think it is so different for men and women in today's day and age. IVF and surrogacy have changed the game quite a bit. I'm 32 and don't plan on having kids for a few more years, but I also know I have options that didn't exist for my parents. Because of these options, I feel I've had the freedom to explore my education and career and I know so many women in their 30's who either don't want children or plan on waiting. This whole "women can have it all thing" is partially true in the sense that it comes in increments, but rarely all at once.
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