[mrnotcrazy]

Programming provides enough income and ideally time outside of work that you should be able to slowly expand in any direction you want.

I will say I have always wanted to be a programmer but I've so far ended up being a better Systems Engineer, regardless though it doesn't worry me since at the end of the day, I am exchanging labor for money.(although I wont Rule out a career change!)

Now my job does have some added meaning in that I help to provide internet to rural areas and I can see myself in many of these end users and I can see how impactful it is to provide services. Real life and meaning and by extension happiness is beyond work, it encompasses work but is so much beyond work. Happiness is like gas in that it expands to fill the space you give it, if you look for happiness in programing, you might be miserable. If you look for happiness in being an excellent worker and craftsman then you might be a little bit happier but there are still probably larger spaces.

Of course people's brains(and hearts) are different so you may want to see a therapist and there is nothing wrong with that.