[pizza234]

> I think often the hard part is establishing just what treating kids like 'young adults' means.

This is very true. A couple of actionable principles that pop out of my mind:

1. if a child can physically do a task, they should do it, at most, with some help. In addition to home "chores", even small, principled actions, like paying their purchases by themselves, and even phone calls (again, with help).

2. lead by example and not verbally; classic example: don't consume junk food, rather than consuming it and (separately) teaching that it's bad. This is very hard, but it gives parents an entirely different credibility.

This approach works when it's started early though (especially point 1). I have no idea if I could make this work (I think not) if I had to deal with a 10-years old child who had a different upbringing.