[dtx1]

Hey Internet Person!

First let me say that it's okay to feel this way. Especially since corona hit and it affected all of us, no matter who we are.

Reading between the lines, you may very likely suffer from depression. That is nothing to be ashamed about and nothing that can't be fixed. I would recommend looking for some psychiatric help.

You may not believe it right now, but as a rational person you may accept it as a truth anyway: Your Brain Chemistry effects how you feel and how you see the world around you, to the point that you literally see the world around you as more grey[1].

On a more personal note, having been in a very similar situation, you may try to reach out to old friends you haven't talked to in a while. I have reached out to a good friend I haven't talked to in years and I'm so glad he's back in my life and he was happy to hear from me as well.

I wish you all the best!

[1] https://time.com/4018860/sadness-color-perception/