[29athrowaway]

Probably what he really means is untrusting of committed relationships like marriage, or marriage as an institution.

Which is completely normal if you got divorced and got a visitation schedule where you don't get to see your kids often.

On top of that, alimony and child support can ruin a person.

[asabjorn]

It may then be better to say you are untrusting of the family court industrial complex, that is set up to contain the social contagion of the former family unit and to extract as many resources as possible from the carcass as it splits into two taxable households.

It’s very common that a man end up with little time with the kids as the family court system is stuck on 1950s assumption around the woman being a housewife, and because a woman usually marry up also a huge bill every month. I’ve seen people driven near bankruptcy from it.

This is a great podcast for those unaware of how dangerous it is when your family enters the family court system

https://youtu.be/9S60kJA6tic

[29athrowaway]

A long legal battle with your spouse is mutually assured destruction.

The key question to ask yourself is "how does this benefit my kids?"

For the people planning to get married, understand that 50% of marriages end up in divorce of separation, and the median duration is about 8 years. You usually not have much to win by getting married. Plus, divorce rates tend to go up.

If you are already married and plan to stay married, watch this video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyty0xb7IMM

[asabjorn]

Yes, and the wife is usually naive to the predatory nature of the institutional players. The ex-wife in the attached podcast got a nudge from a social worker that she may get full custody if there was abuse involved, so she spend 1.5 million of their common resources and is now 450k in debt to her lawyer on what turned out to be a provably false accusation.

His story is more common than what many may think as many women believe she can get full custody by accusing the man of violence or abuse. And too many drain family finances on a lottery bid for that even when there is concrete proof she lies.

[corey_moncure]

Surely it isn't in the best interest of the state to allow families to destroy themselves in such a manner!

[asabjorn]

I suggest just watching the podcast I shared. This was a disappointing insight to me as well, but I've heard this from so many now and seen it personally that I must just accept it as truth. You can find many other resources on the topic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9S60kJA6tic