[iancmceachern]

That's what I'm getting at. You don't get to. It's the same with having a kid via birth. You don't just get to say this sucks halfway through and give up. It's not as of the system works well, it's not as if it's all fairy tales and sunshine. The kids don't just go into another perfect situation. Put another way its not a better situation for the kid, only an out for the parents.

[notch656a]

There is no perfect situation. These are families that "un-adopt a child." They don't want the kid. It stands to reason the kid will (or at least may) be better off if the family that doesn't want it, can find one that does.

>Put another way its not a better situation for the kid, only an out for the parents.

You say this as if it's fact. I don't buy that a kid is always better off (or same) to be with someone who doesn't want them.

>You don't just get to say this sucks halfway through and give up.

You do, and part of the reason for this is because society decided adoption is better than not giving a release valve for situations where parenthood isn't in the interest of the involved parties. The alternative, banning these adoptions / re-adoptions, could result greater risk of dangerous and abusive situations. If you don't allow someone to exit a situation that they see going into a train-wreck, you seal the fate of the kid and the parents going into the train-wreck; better to give these persons an out.

[iancmceachern]

I'm not saying any of that. Just that it's flat out wrong to adopt a child, then give up because it's not what you expected. That's what it is (parenthood). This isn't a job, soccer team or a friendship, it's family.

[notch656a]

If you expected to be able to adequately care and integrate a child into your family, but you are unable to do so, then it makes sense a guardian may choose to adapt to the situation. If reality turns out the child can't be integrated or stay integrated with the family, I'd rather the guardian seek adoption from a family that wants them than let the situation slowly devolve into a train-wreck where they're unwanted.

Simply framing it as any sort of 'not expected' misrepresents the array of situations here.

It may be 'wrong' but at least everyone is better off. Part of life is knowing when to do something others consider 'wrong' so you can achieve the outcome that is 'right.' We shouldn't just shut off the ability to re-adopt out a kid and seal them in with an unwanting family like a trapped rat.