God, you're so, so close. I seriously urge you to go talk to somebody who's had revenge porn distributed of them, or go read an account of the personal violation they felt.
I cannot help you any more than that, it's your own journey to discover empathy and theory of mind.
Everybody thinks muggings are wrong, and yet people are traumatized by muggings. People thing school shootings are wrong, yet they’re traumatic.
I suggest you go ask one for yourself if you don’t believe me, because frankly you don’t know what you’re talking about.