[ytNumbers]

Let me start by offering my condolences on your loss. I know that this must be an incredibly difficult time for you. Since you asked for advice, I'll begin with the obvious: You should consider taking at least a week off from work. The work will still be there when you return. I'd also recommend not trying to rush the grieving process. I would, however, encourage you to (for now) put out of your mind all of the "woulda, coulda, shoulda's" because anything that resembles assigning blame is not going to be helpful to you. You've now embarked on a difficult journey. Embracing that journey is one way to honor the memory of the loved one you've lost.