[roenxi]

I do agree with the advice but I think the natural next-problem is someone is they'll follow it and end up sitting mutely nodding and listening for 20 minutes, then get disheartened because that is obviously not working well.

Being quiet is good but it has to be a component in a broader strategy. The point is still to help people solve their problems; just to have humility enough to realise that it is impossible to know what someone's problems are until they have told you. Guessing other people's problems has a bad success rate. I think the really enlightened strategy is understanding that everyone wants everyone around them to be successful and then being effective at bringing that out into the open and welding a community together.

[webmobdev]

Listening doesn't mean you just sit quietly. You have to be an active listener. That means using non-verbal cues (nodding, squeezing hands etc.) to show you are listening and chiming in with empathy. E.g. "What? That must have meed you feel pissed of at so-and-so!" or "I would have been crushed if someone told that to my face." or even the inquisitive *"Did that annoy you? Why do you think he said that?"* ... etc. When people vent, they mainly do it for two reason - (1) expressing their true feelings is healthy and (2) they are looking for validation of their actions, feeling and emotions.

Listening helps with 1, active listening helps with 2. (And sometimes, not validating some feeling or emotion that seems inappropriate for the situation, without offering advise, also helps.)