[hipshaker]

Concieved first kid at 43. Kid is now 14 months and I am 44. Sometimes I do feel I should’ve shaved off a year or two, just because of general energy level and wanting to have a long life with my child. With that said, I am also glad I waited. Besides above, it’s the right time in my life for me. I actually never thought it would happen, but as I got older A feeling slowly crept up on me. Dying without leaving anything important behind. What is life, if not to pass it on. You may be weird. That’s ok. Live that life. You may not be weird. Ok too. But you will become weirder by choosing not to have children. Don’t take my word for it. The people you know over 40-45, are there more with than without children? Those without, do they seem a bit off the beaten path? Not implying they can’t be happy, I’m not correlating. Having a kid is hard. Stupid hard. Lot’s of responsibility and you can wave bye-bye to oh so many things you are used to. But by some magic, even after hours of crying, being fussy and the biggest pain in the ass, a little laugh and a 5 second smile can erase all the days hardships. This is HN, so lots of logic, rationality and reasoning. But with i child, magic does exist. Leave the world alone as you entered it, and everything you accumulated through life will be lost… like tears in rain.

[ix101]

The flip side though is that you are likely to feel more pressure to accumulate enough wealth in order to leave something behind for your children. Personally I have to shake off this instinct that I should take the more stable career choice rather than the interesting one.

[hipshaker]

That’s probably both a cultural (especially if you are from the US - which I am not) and personal “issue”. I actually do feel like that sometimes though. Not in the sense that I need to leave a big inheritance. Just make enought o help my kids out when they need it, as my parents helped me.

But in the end, the only thing you need to leave behind, is love. That’s the pressure I think one should feel. No child needed money more than a loving parent who was attentive and a caring presence. Sure, if you can be that and leave some $$ after you pass, good on you. But money comes at a price, and only lottery winners get that ride for free.