[dsugarman]

Your broader post shows that you actually care to someone soliciting feedback and I know you didn't solicit any yourself but I hope I could add some value. You're trying to give the gift of perspective but the tone is just awful to receive, their feelings are valid whether they has $5, $500k or $5M in the bank, it's just a feeling based on their own goals and perspective. You can build much better relationships and people will listen and respect you more if you lead with empathy. You can deliver a much more powerful message by saying "I know you feel inadequate today, I've felt that way too and it's really tough, but if you put things in perspective you are way ahead of your peers on things that really matter (money, life experiences, etc.)" That's what you were really saying anyway in the first 2 paragraphs.

[Scea91]

> That's what you were really saying anyway in the first 2 paragraphs.

Maybe it would be more effective but OP was not really saying the "I've felt that way too and it's really tough" part.

I have a problem with this 'lead with (fake) empathy' approach that at broader scale it makes it seem like EVERYONE has depression, imposter syndrome, etc.

There are many of us who are genuinely happy with where they are at life and it feels almost improper to share that publicly.

[dsugarman]

I could totally understand how you would read it that way, it's true that I don't know exactly what he would empathize with, but the point isn't to be fake, it's to be genuine. It's not that you are feeling imposter syndrome as some true false thing, I don't think I ever have, but usually people don't feel 100% good about everything in their lives 100% of the time. If you can't empathize with that, which honestly I have to question, you should be able to empathize with something and you lead with that. What's right for you in your words.

This stuff isn't intuitive, strong communication is hard work, leading isn't easy. A younger me would take your post personally, "he twisted my words and called me fake!", but assigning bad intention is rarely right and never helpful. I could instead reread my post and understand clearly how someone could read it that way and that's the empathy that was true to me so that's what I led with.