| Hey OP, I’m a couple years older than you but have gone through this over the last few years. Also haven’t had a serious relationship since I got divorced in my early 30s and was feeling stagnant in my career. Things changed for me when I stopped giving a shit about work. It’s something I do for money. I enjoy being good at it, but I work my 40 a week, collect a paycheck, treat my direct reports like human beings rather than “resources” and go home. I found having a creative hobby outside work helps. Putting all your creative energy into a job is frustrating because the job never gives you back as much as you put in. I took up piano at 35 having never had any exposure. I’m by no means good, but I enjoy it and it gives me something to do. I can see my progress, and it helps me not feel stuck in life. I do it for me. Similarly, I have a competitive / athletic hobby. I’m not good at that either, but I’ve risen from dead last to middle of the pack. I’ve also met a lot of people through it who are great casual friends (not going to say what it is because it’s a really small niche of a niche). So maybe try doing more things you know you’re bad at but have always wanted to do. Watching yourself grow through them helps prevent you from feeling stagnant. It also helps you be a more interesting person, which will help you in the dating scene. And on dating, try to put yourself out of your comfort zone there too. Sadly with the pandemic most dating happens through apps. Maybe go out on a date with someone you normally wouldn’t, like a same-sex partner if the idea has ever held any appeal to you. It’s never too late to experiment, and at our age you should have already realized that nobody other than your mom gives enough of a shit about you to care what you do in life. |