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I don't really recommend digital nomadism for being less lonely or making friends. You end up just having to make new friends over and over if you keep moving (which is what being a digital nomad is) which is emotionally exhausting and feels sisyphean. I'm speaking from experience here. Unless you want to be an expat or move to a new city, which is a different thing. But won't necessarily solve your problems, and while other expats can be an extremely friendly bunch to befriend (you're both all alone in a foreign place / isolated linguistically) - it's also easy for it to be a booze-based friendship. That being said, travel is definitely worthwhile, but try some shorter trips first before deciding to move your whole life to see if you like it and find out what kinds of destinations appeal to you. Don't trust what you read online about the best spots, or location arbitrage, or what the locals are like or how hot they are. See for yourself because everyone has different tastes when it comes to travel. But I mean if you live in a huge city in a shit neighborhood, maybe try a nicer neighborhood. Or if you like in a small town or city with nothing going on, maybe try a bigger city. Mix things up. Learn to be the host of your own events, to connect the new acquaintances you do meet to each other, rather than sitting around waiting for a new person you just met to text you. When I was at my peak extroversion and friend-making skills while I was doing my own digital nomad thing, I would literally throw out random "you seem like a pretty cool person and I'm new here and trying to make new friends, here's my number if you'd like to go out for drinks with me and another recent acquaintance I've made named Jorb this weeekend" to random employees at cafes, whereever and hand them a napkin with my #. Cringe as hell, but when you get truly desperate while traveling you throw your pride to the floor. Live in a walkable big city with lots of events and diverse types of people if you hate the nerd monoculture (see NYC not Palo Alto). Or if you are in a smaller place, lean even harder into making things happen yourself. If there's no first-person drone racing group in Toledo, OH but that's what you wanna do - figure out ways to advertise it - start your own. Tell every person you meet and everyone you interact with - cashiers or whoever - that you're starting a FPV drone racing group and if they are interested or know anyone who might be to check the meetup.com site you make or whatever. Pretend you're a quest giver in an MMO. Join activities where there's opportunity to talk during or after (so not a yoga class, but yes to a kickball league where you're on the sidelines for stretches), or there's activity->followed by drinks. Just make sure you limit yourself to a drink or two and don't make getting drunk a necessary part of friendship. It's not sustainable, especially in your 30s. Join activities (or create your own) where you'll see the same group each week. Put forth effort. It's hard, but it's worthwhile. Avoid friendships that only are fun when you are both drinking. Or friendships that are based on no common interest/activity OR humor. You either need to share an interest or share humor for it to work IMO, even if getting drunk together for a couple of years once a week will make the person tolerable. Accept that a lot of activities that foster friendship just either cost money, and allocate the budget for it, because its absolutely important for mental health (if you are the type that is extremely frugal, but also feeling really depressed or lonely). When you start to make friends, try to think about what you can do for them. Check in on how they are feeling, offer help when they are struggling with something, or offer to bring food when they are sick, or move boxes when they are moving. The older you get, the more difficult it is to forge really strong emotional bonds, but that means these sorts of things mean a lot more to people. |