[elb2020]

"These sharks have an estimated lifespan of 400 years and they spend their time swimming around looking for mates."

I will not complain about my own 50 year search, then.

[kazinator]

"looking for mates" is nautical language; when first or second mates are unavailable, they will eat the usually older captains, too.

[tsol]

To be fair Greenland sharks reach sexual maturity at 150 years old. So you know, their awkward teen years are probably longer too. Just imagine having to listening to angsty rock music for 80 years