[akprasad]

I completely empathize, and it's why I held off on it for so long.

But recently I quit my job and decided to start in order to keep myself accountable. I've been pleasantly surprised by what I've gotten out of it so far and wrote down my thoughts here:

https://arunkprasad.com/log/why-i-blog/

[fm2606]

I do not understand the concept of self-accountability. If I say I'm going to do something for myself and not do it then what? If it is the self "shame" (for lack of a better word) for not performing/completing the goal/task I set for myself it will have to go to the end of the line of "self shame"; a very long line with many far more shameful things I've done/haven't done/started-and-not-completed through out my 51+ years.

I do envy those who can hold themselves accountable and get things done.

[akprasad]

Another way of putting it is that for me, blogging is giving me some structure right now that I find useful.

Blogging daily enforces some measure of discipline on my time. Then I build the habit of putting serious effort into something every day, even in the absence of a job. The fact that it's intrinsic is also quite empowering. And if I want to be satisfied with what I write, I need to push myself and write about things that are difficult for me, i.e. new or complex ideas. Especially since I'm using this time to reflect, that means thinking about my values, my work habits, and my long-term career goals. When I look at my cumulative posts I can see that I've done some creative and satisfying. And these posts are also artifacts I can share with others, so there's a social element too.

In the absence of that, especially with my new glut of free time, I could see myself falling into the trap of not really doing anything. Maybe not immediately, but over time. And while that's certainly not a bad place to be, it's not where I want to go. So there's a protective element to this too; if I break the routine, I'll know immediately that something has gone astray.

[aitkenably]

For me, self-accountability isn't about shame. It's realizing that in my better & stronger moments, I identified my goals and what I wanted to accomplish. So now, when it's time to execute (and I'm perhaps in a weaker moment), I trust the previous version of myself and follow my original plan.