[zepto]

The “root” is likely to be trauma or bad experiences in your past. E.g. bullying, poor parenting, divorce, poverty, neglect, etc. there are many many possibilities.

It’s pretty easy to have these kinds of experience and not be sure how they relate you your current experience.

Knowing what the “root” is helpful over the long term for eventual healing, but over the short and medium term you need support. There are many people here discussing therapy and doing a better job than I can.

Importantly, know that there is a reason you feel this way, and that even if it feels like it’s your fault, you don’t deserve to suffer like this. It is possible to heal, and that will likely be a gradual process that take times and support.

Be as kind to yourself as you can - even a small amount helps, and seek help.