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by dkonofalski
1643 days ago
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>My felt experience is not "making things up". I have never said that anyone was making anything up. Please do not put words into my mouth or make statements on my behalf when I have not said them. >I apologize if it did not land well for you This sounds like a abusive partner apologizing. "I'm sorry you made me so mad that I had to hit you" >I am hearing counterexamples to this statement You're not hearing counter-examples. You're hearing situations where the person, in the past, was lucky enough to not be affected by the situation they were in. That's great. It's like someone who refuses to wear their seatbelt telling someone that they never wear their seatbelt and they've never been injured even though they've driven 10000000 miles in that car. If reducing your chances of dying in a car wreck is important to you, you would have worn a seatbelt. This is like complaining that the car's seat belt chime wasn't insistent enough after you got into a wreck and are now paralyzed. |
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Nobody is attacking you here.
Yet, I experience your interactions here as carrying defensiveness and un-checked assumptions. That is my experience. That is different from me saying, “you are defensive.”
I am having an experience in this dialogue that feels in opposition to one of the main principles encouraged in this board, which is that of graciousness and good intent. I do not feel you have been reading my comments from that kind of orientation. Perhaps you have and I have misconstrued.
Regardless, I really don’t care enough about this issue to continue engaging with you about it like this.
Take care.