[giantg2]

It's that we live in a two-face system. The schools, companies, etc have policies that are supposed to eliminate or control bias. They claim it's a meritocracy. But then they tout having a network, "who you know vs what you know", etc. So why are bribes, gifts, etc tightly controlled and even illegal in many areas? So one type of bias is ok, but others are not?

You end up with people like me who are told by a friend that they will open up a senior dev position just for you. That means the other people who post to that role are putting effort into the interview process but all for nothing since I'm pre-selected. So I don't ask them to open posting so I don't take the position. So I think these backroom deals are wrong, have been taught that by society, and so I get screwed like every other unconnected person.

[Zerverus]

This assumes that human social interaction somehow is optional, exactly the mistake the parent went to point out.

There is no world where social skills somehow are ‘bias’. They are core.

[giantg2]

Social skills are not bias themselves. This who you know thing is - preference is given to people who are known. This makes it less likely that people who have different attributes get an equal chance.