[horsawlarway]

Ever been under 18 and owned a spray paint can or a permanent marker? Crime.

Ever connected to an open wifi network without directly confirming with the owner you're allowed? Crime.

Ever held your phone while driving? Crime. Happen to also be headed downhill and hit 1mph over the limit? Double crime!

Ever walked across your street outside of clearly marked crossings? Crime.

Ever sung happy birthday in public? Crime.

Ever played a poker game for small stakes at home? Crime.

Ever had a pet and not registered them with your county? Crime.

Ever peed outside? Crime.

Ever bought something online and not reported it for taxes? Crime.

Ever sat on the sidewalk? Crime.

The list goes on and on.

[Sohcahtoa82]

> Ever sung happy birthday in public? Crime.

I'm assuming this is regarding Happy Birthday being copyrighted? If so, you should know that that copyright was declared invalid, and Happy Birthday is now public domain.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happy_Birthday_to_You#Copyrigh...

Also, copyright infringement is only a crime if it is done for financial gain. Otherwise, it's a civil issue. You won't get jailed for pirating a movie. You CAN get jailed for SELLING pirated copies of a movie.

> Ever played a poker game for small stakes at home? Crime.

I heard this isn't true unless the host takes a rake, though this might depend on the state.

[_jal]

Right, I'm sure a white-collar exec took kickbacks because poker is banned in some jurisdictions.

I agree that we massively overcriminalize things. But apologizing for a crook this way is just silly.

(Not to mention you're factually incorrect on some of this, universalizing the rest when it isn't universal, and generally being very hyperbolic.)

[wayoutthere]

It’s more about the general erosion of the rule of law. It forces you to weigh “how wrong is this” versus “will I get caught”. We make these choices every day, and after a while, it moves your own morality (especially when faceless, abusive corporate structures are the victim).

When unchecked, corruption becomes a local maximum. The corporate version of “plata o plumbo” (silver or lead, the choice Pablo Escobar gave government officials in Columbia) is an unspoken rule at a lot of “cash cow” companies or mature industries; they won’t trust you unless they can hold something like this over your head. Step out of line and they prosecute you, or if you don’t play ball your metrics will look like shit and you’ll get fired for poor performance.

My guess is that this guy just made some powerful enemies.

[horsawlarway]

I'm responding directly to the comment above, asking which crimes they might have unintentionally committed.

You'll notice I make no comment about the kickbacks here.

And yes - the whole POINT is that none of these are all that intuitive, and they vary by region. So the odds are very good that you're violating some city/town/state ordinance fairly often, but the lack of enforcement means you never consider it.

[Cerium]

For those questioning the online taxes - if you are in California you absolutely have to pay taxes on these purchases. You can pay actual taxes or an "estimate" based on your income if you believe you have normal levels of purchasing.

From [1]: Generally, if sales tax would apply when you buy physical merchandise in California, use tax applies when you make a similar purchase without tax from a business located outside the state. For these purchases, the buyer is required to pay use tax separately.

[1] https://www.cdtfa.ca.gov/taxes-and-fees/use-tax.htm

[gunshai]

This read like straight out of a Legal Eagle Youtube video.

I think this is like the exact list in a recent video of his. Great channel by the way if people are unfamiliar

[___q]

"Happy birthday" is public domain and

you don't need to report things you buy online on your taxes

[horsawlarway]

> "Happy birthday" is public domain

Only after 2016. Before that you would have been on the hook for ~$700 per performance to warner media group.

Admittedly, in most "Private" settings, you'd be fine. The most common place to get flagged was in a restaurant where the waiters sing to you.

> you don't need to report things you buy online on your taxes

Ooof, I got some bad news for you, buddy. You ABSOLUTELY DO need to report any online purchase that does not charge you sales tax at time of payment. Most retailers will now do this (primarily because Amazon abused the shit out of this to give customers an additional ~10% off, and the IRS started handing out fines) but for things like: Craigslist, Ebay, Alibaba, etc - You better be reporting it, you little criminal you.

[___q]

> Only after 2016.

Which it is right now, so "happy birthday" is public domain.

> You ABSOLUTELY DO need to report any online purchase that does not charge you sales tax

The original post didn't say "that do not charge tax." Yes you must pay taxes where applicable, like all purchases.

[horsawlarway]

He asked which laws he might have unintentionally broken. Unless he's an incredibly literate 6 year old... I suspect he's old enough to have sung happy birthday before 2016, which would have been breaking the law.

The original post also didn't specify that you picked an online vendor that's calculating this tax for you... And in some places, you're still supposed to be reporting it! Fun times!

[ghaff]

>you don't need to report things you buy online on your taxes

In at least some states (e.g. Massachusetts) you are indeed supposed to report out of state purchases brought into the state whether or not the company selling to you collected the state sales tax or not. (Larger companies shipping to you now have to collect.)