[cainxinth]

I don’t think I felt dumb for not getting it. I did feel confused. It was like those magic eye stereograms. I used to not be able to see those (still difficult, but I get one now and again). But before I could, I would hear everyone exclaiming how cool it was and I was like, dammit why can’t I see what they are seeing.

One day that clicked too and my mind was blown.

I had the same experience in a different way with the movie Tenet. I love Chris Nolan, but I simply didn’t get that movie on the first watching… or the second, or the third. But I could tell there was something there I was missing and I was determined to figure it out.

On the fourth viewing I sat there with an online guide to the movie in my lap and paused anytime I didn’t get something. Right around three quarters of the way through, that one clicked for me. I finally was getting the logic of the film’s premise. All the scenes that looked like a crazy ballet of action that made no sense to me suddenly made perfect sense… and it felt great!

Love that feeling of finally understanding something you were having trouble groking.

[wolverine876]

IMHO, it's the most valuable, important learning in life (and a great feeling). And the most important learning skill is to have the open-mindedness to believe there is something to it when we don't understand, and patience and persistence to discover it. Some things have taken decades, some are yet undiscovered.

Two techniques I use that help, though are not panaceas: 1) Many differences in perspectives come down to different agendas. If you see a trumpet and expect jazz, you are going to have a hard time understanding other uses of it. I try to look for their agendas. 2) More broadly, there's another presence in the room, the artist. They have a completely independent universe in their head than my own - theirs has nothing to with me, it's not a variation on mine, it's not an argument or debate with mine. Focus on them, forget about me.