| Mom was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer a few years back. Thanks to immunotherapy she's doing well, but it was an absolutely brutal road that involved surgery and lots of chemo. Not out of the woods but we're optimistic. Anyway, a few things come to mind: 1. anticipate needs, especially as she gets further into chemo. Blueberry and spinach shakes with protein power was something she found vaguely palatable after infusions, so I kept the ingredients on deck if she woke up in the middle of the night hungry and in pain. Small example but stringing enough of the small things together is hugely supportive, which goes a long way psychologically. 2. Ice her hands and feet 15 minutes before chemo infusions and throughout. Does a lot to fight neuropathy, which is awful. She came out relatively unscathed; a friend hers who didn't ice has issues walking. 3. bit of a continuation from 2: cancer treatment is full of small horrors. Is her port going to get fucked up? Is she going to have a reaction to this new drug? It goes on. Gear up for it. I kept an internal dialog that went like "harden the fuck up, get through this shit for her, not you." Corny but useful. 4. Walk the line between being helpful and being overbearing. My mom hated being "the cancer patient". She needed support but didn't want to be babied. 5. Have her join a cancer group. My mom has made some incredible connections with people also fighting breast and other cancers. 6. Moderate what you're reading online and don't go too far down the rabbit hole. You'll hear this from her oncologist and others too. Obvious reflex but counterproductive It won't be easy but I wish you both good luck. Medicine is getting pretty good. |