[saltcured]

Given your generalized query, I can only give some general advice for family caregivers. It may even sound shocking or cold at first, but you need to remember to make your own health your number one priority. It rarely makes sense to sacrifice your own well-being to care for others. Sacrifice can be a romantic notion but it is ultimately short-sighted in real life. You need to maintain strength, health, and security (physical, emotional, social, and financial) to not only handle today's events but to handle later events which might be just as challenging if not more so. To provide stable, ongoing support, you need yourself to be stable and functional for the long term.

So, be careful not to exceed your capacity, and make corrections if you find yourself in decline already. Don't be afraid to seek help for yourself. A loved one's cancer diagnosis does not mean you should tough it out and ignore your own "lesser" issues. Many people can over do it and feel the negative impacts with some weeks or months of delay. The delay in effect can also make it harder to recognize what is really at the root of new emotional or behavioral struggles.

On the other side, you might see if support groups or clinical social workers can steer you towards available services. Sometimes, you ought to engage the help of others whether they are charitable/free or paid services. It is not always realistic to do it all yourself, and you may not even know enough to identify the needs and relevant services yet.

Once you have recognized the limits of what you can contribute, you might also recognize where you feel conflicted between work and family. Unless you are independently wealthy, you probably need to preserve your job while providing care. But, you might start to see some aspects of your job or career which could be renegotiated either temporarily or permanently. Are there things you could offload to your teammates or your boss in order to manage your stress level and balance? Do you find your priorities in life shifting with a new perspective gained from the health crisis?