| My sympathies. My father has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer a few months ago. He's lost a ton of weight and energy and has had a few minor endoscopic procedures and one by-pass surgery (tumor closed off end of his stomach). What's help me the most is how my father has dealt with it. He has the best attitude of anyone I've heard of with this condition. He's always positive. (Maybe that is not much help for you, but it's at least something to consider.) Another thing that helped me was seeing him take control of his time and energy instead of having it dictated to him. He did very light chemo early on, 3 weeks. And I've never seen him so low in my life. First time ever that he didn't meet me at the door when I visited. He didn't get up one time when I visited. He stopped chemo (his choice) and his hair is getting color back finally, and he's been doing better. Talking with him every day about normal life things has made the situation bearable and dare I say, mundane, for now. If I was in your shoes, I'd get your mom to be able to live as normal a life as possible with the time she has left. Everything that drags her down should be set aside. I help my father with chores and small activities, and I have come to accept that this is likely that last days I will have with him. All our parents are going to die, it's life, might as well have the last days be as decent as possible. It's hard to suggest not taking treatments, but quitting chemo is what turned my father from a zombie back into his nearly normal self. He may die faster this way, but he's able to spend the time he has left some what normally. Again, I am sorry you are having to face this. I am blessed that my father is not suffering severe pain right now, and I hope you and your mother find some comfort. |