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by LurkingPenguin 1706 days ago
> I think for society to fully embrace decriminalization there needs to be a diversion mechanism.

Yes, let's make men who want to pay for sex watch an hour-long video extolling the virtues of "real" relationships.

The reality is that there are a lot of men who enter into "normal" relationships with women in large part because it gives them easier access to sex. Not all of them are happy. Lots of them overextend themselves financially, and generally do things they wouldn't otherwise do, to keep their girlfriends satisfied.

These are less direct exchanges, but they are exchanges nonetheless.

I'm living in East Asia, which has made me think more about the exchanges that take place in relationships between men and women. Here, it's common to see men with expressionless looks on their faces lugging their girlfriends' handbags, spending 20 minutes helping them take cutesy photos, pushing strollers carrying not children but tiny, professionally-groomed pups, etc.

As a warm-blooded man, you'd have a hard time convincing me that access to sex isn't a big reason these men are putting up with this stuff. Why do men who pay for sex need a diversion mechanism but the men who totally lose themselves in a relationship don't?

1 comments

Arguably both do. I am well aware that both prostitution and 'real' relationships both exist on the same continuum of exchange. What I would like to see are long term studies on the outcomes in prostitution and non prostitution communities.
Outcomes in terms of what?
Length of relationships, self reported happiness, lifespan etc. Anything statistically significant.
And then what? You're going to tell consenting adults what they're allowed to do based on some subjective analysis of these?

What happens if the men who pay directly for sex report shorter relationships and have lifespans 6 months shorter than men who don't, but they tell you they're happier? Or what happens if you discover that men who pay for sex while in relationships report longer relationships?

Of course not. It's like smoking, a case for disincentives. As for data that doesn't yet exist, I can't comment.
Why are you already bringing up disincentives? Your comments hint that you've already decided there is something inherently wrong with paying directly for sex. You're totally dismissing the possibility that research might very well find that prostitution is a net positive for individuals, and that most of the associated negatives are caused by its criminalization.