[jokethrowaway]

1) You failed your own business. That's ok, try again as soon as you can. Don't feel like you can't do it or that you need contracting or a perm job or better contacts, you can do it.

2) You may not realise it but you're going through depression. You will never go to a therapist, for sure, but you can at least read on cognitive behavioural therapy and try to get your shit together.

3) Read about philosophy, the same philosophy you bullshitted through in high school. Philosophy will give you tools to understand more and to function better. Read on stoicism and on nihilism.

4) Everything will be fine. And if it doesn't, it doesn't matter.