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I agree with others that therapy is going to help you fix this problem (and others) more thoroughly than trying to muster up the willpower to do what you know you should be doing. You aren't a screwup, you aren't stupid. But you did get dealt a crappy hand and you're (naturally) struggling to improve it. That being said, the number 1 thing that helped move me out of a situation similar to yours financially (grew up in poverty, poor impulse control, etc) was listening to the Dave Ramsey podcast every day. It probably doesn't matter if you listen to Dave Ramsey or one of the others mentioned in the article, so just go with someone. Though I will say that once every episode Dave Ramsey has someone come on and do their Debt Free Scream where they tell their story of getting out of debt, and then they shout at the top of their lungs, "I'M DEBT FREE!!!" And that was incredibly motivating, and at times emotionally moving and I even cried sometimes. Anyway, listen to it as often as you can: on your commute, in the shower, while working out, while cooking, while eating, etc. Get it in to your bones. What this did for me was it began changing the way I think about money. As I listened to hours of Dave Ramsey tell people everyday that saving money was cool, paying off debt is cool and the best way to financial freedom, that the 7 baby steps are achievable, my thoughts around money slowly changed, and so did my behavior. At first I disagreed with Ramsey a lot, especially how he treated some callers (that has improved a fair amount over the years, thankfully). But eventually I saw the wisdom in what he was saying. |