Can you really be a Software Engineer without a degree? Developer, yes, but the term "engineer" has a certain level of professionalism associated with it that an autodidact computer programmer wouldn't necessarily have.
I'm going to go with yes you are being too pedantic. No one really knows what to call programmers so we make up things to say. I write code for my company so I'm the guy who makes things happen to some and to others I perform some sort of dark arts.
I'm pretty good at making things work and bringing a lot of knowledge to any situation requiring my skills.
Does that make me an engineer? Does my lack of degree disqualify me?
Well, we take (I took) a 'Computers and Society' class, where we talked about the consequences, morality + responsibilities of S.E.. Other than that it was just a bunch of programming etc classes. If you want that 'certified' feeling, maybe find a local school where that course is offered, take it, and then join the ACM.
For point of reference, check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron_Ring#The_Ritual_of_the_Cal...
> It is a symbol that reflects the moral, ethical and professional commitment made by the engineer who wears the ring.
I'm not an engineer myself and I wouldn't presume to call myself one unless I'd gone through the engineering training.
Am I being too pedantic?