[ajdecon]

The key, for me, is forging and maintaining relationships with other people. I spend a lot of time with my girlfriend, which is the best thing ever. I hang out with a few close friends. When I can commit to decent blocks of free time, I fence epee and go kayaking, and socialize with others who take part in those activities.

When I can't manage that kind of commitment, or I need solitary time, I read a lot of fiction and play with the cats. I also have some hobbies with low time commitments or at least a lot of flexibility: robotics, learning about science outside my own field, brewing beer. Occasionally I'll do something related to my current field (HPC), but even then I have a strict no-real-work rule: the only work that gets done on weekends, barring emergencies, is on side projects.

I learned to do this after grad school, during which I focused on my work 100%... and then experienced a period of burnout so intense I could not imagine ever being happy again. I know a few of people who seem happy, or at least satisfied, in a cycle of 100% for a year or two, followed by 4-6 months of burnout, then back to work. But my burnout was accompanied by depression, continuous feelings of failure and shame, and a deep lack of interest in anything in the world. No amount of productivity is worth my sanity: I need my work-life balance.