[walrus01]

If you want it done quickly tell them you're going to prison.

[lostcolony]

You say that, but my wife had to pay a cancellation fee to them despite the fact she was moving in with another Comcast customer.

I will never willingly use Comcast (and they don't care, because monopoly).

[rainbowzootsuit]

"I'm going to prison:"

Like shibboleet, but for cancellations.

[Teelo]

This had me cracking up, it's genius though. When I had to cancel I told them I'm leaving the country but I'm gonna use the prison line next time.

[kevin_thibedeau]

Or just say you're moving.