It’s talked about in small circles, but not broadly. Anecdotally, my wife and one of her friends are the only people I know who quickly conceived and had a child without issue over 30.
My very close friend and his wife gave up after years of treatments. My sister and her husband are coming up on years of unsuccessful treatments. Several of my wife’s close friends either required treatments, have lost one or more pregnancies, and/or have yet to succeed with treatments.
It’s more than enough to make you feel like there is something serious going on. There was an article recently about aggressive drops in male fertility, which might shed light.
In my mind, the other big piece is readiness / pressure. I don’t think it’s everything, but I do think there must be a huge mental component to conception. The people who are more financially stable and on the same page seem to have the easiest time.
>The people who are more financially stable and on the same page seem to have the easiest time.
In my experience it's been the opposite. The people I know who are financially secure seem to struggle more to have kids. They'll go to doctors and fertility clinics and such.
On the other hand, the people I know who are not very financially secure at all have had no problems having children. Much of the time they aren't even trying, it just happens.
It seems almost like the people who feel the most pressured about having kids, the ones who are trying and stressed out about it are the ones who struggle at it.
==The people who are more financially stable and on the same page seem to have the easiest time. ==
How does this square with people getting unsuccessful treatments? Wouldn't you have to be pretty financially stable and "on the same page" to afford fertility treatments?
Fair point. I should’ve said relatively financially stable (which often translates to feeling poor with a certain crowd - often a point of disagreement between husband and wife) versus abundantly rich.
Funny enough, thinking more, the abundantly rich couples who easily had kids spend the least time together, as the husbands work jobs that dominate their lives.
> It’s more than enough to make you feel like there is something serious going on.
A lot of people are putting off having children until much later in their lives, in part due to how expensive raising a child is now. For a majority of people, fertility isn't exactly constant from puberty to old age/menopause.
One more 2nd/3rd order societal problem that the "invisible hand of the market" cannot possibly fix, those who'd want/need to buy that option cannot afford it at that point in their lives.
For us this was true until we'd experienced it and started talking about it publicly. It turns out we have a lot of friends and acquaintances who were willing to open up with us once they knew they weren't alone. Like in many other struggles, having a common bond with others makes it easier to bear.
Check out the book Why We Get Sick: The Hidden Epidemic at the root of most chronic disease(0). TL;DR: Insulin resistance. There’s some great discussion about men’s and women’s fertility in there.
My very close friend and his wife gave up after years of treatments. My sister and her husband are coming up on years of unsuccessful treatments. Several of my wife’s close friends either required treatments, have lost one or more pregnancies, and/or have yet to succeed with treatments.
It’s more than enough to make you feel like there is something serious going on. There was an article recently about aggressive drops in male fertility, which might shed light.
In my mind, the other big piece is readiness / pressure. I don’t think it’s everything, but I do think there must be a huge mental component to conception. The people who are more financially stable and on the same page seem to have the easiest time.