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by default_friend
1845 days ago
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Author here! I think what (maybe?) got lost in this blog post is that it's more about the unhealthy nature of lifestyles that encourage the constant churn of socialization than feeling rejected by someone unfollowing me on Twitter. For me, lots of people I know in person follow me on Twitter, it's a bit of a ding. I'm also a super high visibility person on social and elsewhere, which complicates things. But lots of folks are in this boat -- people like me who are constantly meeting new people, folks who work in jobs that necessitate hundreds of applications, people on dating apps who go on hundreds of first dates. It's not so much that every individual rejection is a character indictment on anyone involved, it's more that the transient nature of socialization is stressful. I hope my frame didn't suggest a shallow definition of friendship or one specifically anchored in social. One last example that might be salient - The Bay Area is all about this kind of radical openness that isn't scalable or sustainable. Even if you have more real friends outside of that framework, being a human airport of connection kind of blows. Maybe a very specific scenario. |
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I certainly didn't take it that way, but I do believe the "lingering" nature of these new types of friendships has changed the nature of rejection; or forced things that didn't have a rejection component before to now have one.
And I agree with your point of we have a lot more connections now and, hence, a lot more "micro rejections".
As someone with actual rejection sensitivity (ADHD), I know exactly what you mean.