[CodeGlitch]

I've been where you are, and considered packing it all in. As others have said, not all software shops are the same so I don't agree that there's a universal software dev culture... ignore the silicon valley lot.

If you are set on leaving software dev, you could side step into something like computer/network security... which requires many of the skills you already have.

Additional stop comparing yourself to others, in my case I was doing it and getting incredibly depressed when my peers were getting promotions when I've not moved in 7 years. The way I deal with it is to realise that those people getting promotions are having to do the kind of work I'd personally hate (people management, etc). I'm more happy staying down in the technical weeds. It's not about money - as you've said it's more about happiness.

Good luck