[failwhaleshark]

> I hate the work,

I guess this is a personal / personality / enjoyment match. Become a teacher, work for a nonprofit, or help government improve.

https://www.codeforamerica.org

> hate the people

TBH, I hate arrogant, know-it-all--know-nothing, filter-bubble screen addicts, narcissistic, spineless, socially-transactional "networking" and "hooking-up," smarmy or boring, psychopathic, self-promoting, other-sabotaging, horrid yuppies who tend to grow out of corporations like weeds. Cool people or GTFO.

> the culture

I'm curious. What is it that you hate? Is it a belief system, attitude, or way of doing things?

> etc.

What does this comprise?

> But I can’t afford it: not the monetary cost, not the time cost. If I could magically pull tens of thousands of dollars out of my ass tomorrow maybe,

I would cut back on discretionary expenses and prioritize education/career development.

> or if I wouldn’t be well into my 30s by the time I finished, it would be a different situation.

Might be some covert age shame / ageism going on. You know your life isn't over until you actually die, right? There are people in their 60's, 70's, and 80's who finish college degrees.

> Even then it’s unheard to go from software to anything I’d be interested in.

Why? You can do whatever you want. DLR became an EMT for a while (might've been a stunt, but who knows or cares?).

[treeman79]

Culture varies a lot. Region matters.

San Francisco types are different then mid size city companies. New York companies are their own thing.

On top of common things like a company that loves to blame vs one that doesn’t.

It’s important to either find a match or at least not offended by others.

[Emigre_]

I’m curious... what would you say is the difference between San Francisco’s and NY’s cultures?...

[failwhaleshark]

SF is more accepting of alternative lifestyle and personal choices (not just LGBT+).

NY is more direct, and in a sense, more seemingly trustworthy. SF, you often get vague, awkward, meandering intimations rather than honesty.

In SF, most people are either extremely boring, unreasonable, or have repulsive attitudes. (In NY and SF, they're often Seinfeldian.)

In SF, unless a guy is a model, he should go MGTOW because they'd just be wasting their time with swiping apps that only focus on looks (80% of men are ugly according to women), pedigree, and fruitless clamoring for attention.

SF and NY both have art, but NY has Broadway and book publishing.

[username90]

New York has more women than men. San Francisco has more men than women. Probably because San Francisco is nerdier and techier while New York is more business.

[treeman79]

Personal experience. NY tends to have more a-holes. More prone to micro managing. Trash taking various demographics is becoming culturally acceptable.

[failwhaleshark]

I think a lot of big cities have aholes. See how many BMW-driving yuppies there are in Palo Alto who try to cut you off and get mad when you don't reward their superior, entitled existence.

> Trash taking various demographics

Hasn't that always been a low-class thing?

When/where/what classes of people did it ever go away?

I've seen it done ironically in the UK amongst good friends and coworkers who are definitely not racist.