[Shaddox]

I guess this explains why I feel so trapped. Like a pawn to my own circumstances.

To live life is to live in servitude. I'm a slave to my own needs of bread, water and circus. To supply this never-ending need I must serve someone else too. I must serve the needs of my family as well : they want and expect things out of me too. So where does that leave me? A never-ending cycle of busy-bodying. I can't even get mad or push back anymore. To what end? I'm simply a spectator to my own fate which unravels before me. If it wasn't me, it would have been someone else. Since it wasn't someone else, therefore, it has to be me. I am just a replaceable cog, but this cog still needs to be put to use in a machine.

This made me realize death is the true gift of God to mankind. An end to our seemingly never-ending drudgery.

[nvader]

I've been playing a bit of chess lately. The rules of the game are deterministic, and the best engines have solved many positions completely. Nevertheless, it's still fun to play, for me. I'm trying to play the most optimal move, and yet, nevertheless, what comes out, is the most nvader move. I don't have the free will not to choose as myself.

But I still get to be a part of some really fun games. I still feel shame if I blunder a piece, or the thrill of hunting down a vulnerable king.

And every so often, a pawn makes it to the back rank and promotes to win the game.

[gbuk2013]

From experience, this is not a good thought trajectory. Your life is your making.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1Un-PpgyCnY

[zwkrt]

Based on your posting here I’m guessing you actually have enough freedom to be doing almost anything you want but you’ve “trapped” yourself in some awful situation that allows you to abdicate responsibility based on how terrible it is for you.

[lambda_obrien]

You're probably right, whether we have free will or not, we still cannot tell the future, so we should act as if we have it. This poster is clearly conflating their own life situation, which might limit them somehow, with the universe at large. I could get divorced and disown my son and run off to another place to start another life, but I "can't" do that because of my own morals and limitations for what I'm willing to do. The OP could do a similar thing, but chooses not to because of whatever thing is limiting then from that decision.