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by mindcrime 1899 days ago
This is a tricky question to answer, because the answer is probably very personal and what works for me might not work for you, and vice versa. But I can share some thoughts based on my experiences:

1. Practice. It sounds trite to say, but it's true... like most things, you get better with repeated effort. Luckily it's relatively easy to find / create opportunities to speak in group settings. Well... at least it was pre-pandemic. And will be again once more meatspace meetups and other events resume. But anyway, my point was going to be that many meetups and user groups and similar orgs are always looking for presenters. I've personally gotten a lot of mileage out of volunteering to speak at my local Java User's Group, Linux User's Group, etc. There are also organizations like Toastmasters which exist to give people opportunities to speak in a somewhat "safe" environment and receive constructive feedback.

2. When it comes to presenting, I find this approach valuable: do not write a "speech" or anything that you expect to recite word for word. This isn't like middle school where you have to memorize the Gettysburg Address and recite it perfectly and you get "dinged" if even one word is wrong. When you are presenting, whatever you say is correct by definition (it may be "factually incorrect", but it's "correct" in the sense that it's what you wanted to say and nobody can tell you that you "got a word wrong"). I believe strongly in focus on KNOW YOUR SHIT STONE COLD, rehearse your presentation mentally many, many times ahead of time, but focusing on the broad themes and concepts not trying to remember a specific sequence of words. What I mean by "know your shit stone cold" is, know your stuff down to first principles, where you can just start talking and explain the topic off the cuff with no preparation and no pre-arranged "speech".

3. Corollary to the above: if you use slides, do NOT read the slides to your audience. It's a waste of time: they can read, and they can read faster than you can talk. Treat the slides as nothing more than notes to yourself to remind you what you want to talk about. I can't emphasize this enough: do not, not, not try to repeat the exact words on the slides, either from memory OR by reading off the slide. Glance at it, remind yourself what point you want to make, and then just talk.

4. Further corollary to the above: despite what I said about "know your shit stone cold", I didn't mean "know every possible detail". What I really mean is something like "Have a solid conceptual understanding and know the fundamental principles that underlie whatever you're talking about." If there's a specific detail or something that you don't know, and somebody asks a question just say "I don't know. I can check up on that and get back to you later."

5. Regarding questions and comments that distract you: I've found that in every talk or presentation there is always that one person who asks some irrelevant / tangential / absurd question that has little or nothing to do with what you're talking about, and will not advance the present discussion. Why do they do it? Who knows... probably just to gratify their ego and to show off how smart they are. In either case, I think the best strategy is to "acknowledge, deflect, and ignore." That is, say something like "That's a great question, and I'd love to get into it, but that's outside the scope of the current talk. Now, as I was saying..."

6. I don't do the whole "imagine your audience naked" thing or any weird tricks like that, but I do encourage you to remind yourself repeatedly that your audience are just people... people like you. Except probably not as smart as you. Or not as informed on the topic you're talking about. Because if they were, they would be the one giving the talk. Right? So there's no reason to be intimidated or anything.

7. Regarding jokes, etc: I don't make it a point to tell jokes during most talks, but if one falls naturally out of the material I might drop it. And I will sometimes make a little self-deprecating comment if I commit some faux-pas or get tongue tied or something. I don't advocate a whole session full of self-deprecation and putting yourself down, mind you. But it's OK to show that you're human and fallible and not just a robot.

8. Modeling can be valuable. Watch presentations and talks by people you respect and admire, and see if you can incorporate a few elements from those folks and their approach. I don't advocate trying to outright mimic or copy somebody else, like "oooh, I gotta present just like Steve Jobs" or whatever. But you may find a mannerism here, a joke there, a quip over yonder, that you might want to borrow.

9. Personally I like to walk around a bit when I'm talking if it's something like a JUG presentation or something where that's an option. If it's an internal meeting "around a conference room table" kind of thing and you can't just get up and walk around, then so be it. But when that's an option, I find I feel more relaxed doing that, as opposed to standing behind a podium. I don't necessarily wander all over the place, but I don't like to stand rooted in one spot. Your preference may obviously vary on this point, of course.

10. "Don't borrow trouble" as the old saying goes. That is, don't go imagining all the "bad things" that could happen beforehand. Because by and large, there are no bad things that can happen. Let's say you're presenting to a group of executives at your company, and you're afraid that if you bomb the talk, you'll get fired. Nope. Not gonna happen. Unless you do something absurd like stand up and start spewing racist, misogynistic, anti-semitic, hate-speech filled with vulgarities and threaten to kill everybody in the room. And you aren't going to do that. So no, you aren't going to embarrass yourself so badly that you get fired, or demoted, or anything. Even the fear that everybody might start laughing is not realistic. I've been doing talks in front of groups for 25+ years in various contexts, and outside of intentional jokes, I've never had a large group of the audience bust out laughing. In fact, I'd say it's hard to get people to laugh. To the point that there are people who work very hard to figure out ways to get people to laugh, and very few of them can do it consistently (see: good stand up comics). So really, you're not going to get fired, you're not going to get laughed at, nobody is going to throw a tomato at you, etc. Whatever you're imagining, forget it. That stuff just doesn't happen in real life.

EDIT:

11. To add one more thought: some people recommend taking an improv class. I have taken "Improv 101" at a local improv club, and I think it was a great experience. And I do recommend it in general. What I can't say is how much it helped me with this specific issue, as I'd already been doing public talks for a couple of decades before I ever took the improv class. I think it would help somebody who was trying to get better at this, but it's hard to say for sure. Still, it's usually relatively quick (a 3-4 week class), not too expensive, and is fun and rewarding in its own right. So definitely something worth considering.

HTH. YMMV.

3 comments

#2 is the biggest thing that helped me as I started out presenting earlier on in my career. Along with this, I'd add:

* Keep any slides simple. If you find yourself reading a complete sentence from a slide, you probably have too much text on the slide. The slides aren't there to tell you what to say, they're there to remind you the correct order in which you're organizing your thoughts. If you read from a slide, everyone will know that you're reading from a slide, and it looks silly and makes the crowd disengage. They'll just start reading the slides themselves and ignore you.

* Try to practice forcing yourself not to fill dead space with "um" or "uh". It feels awkward to silently pause for a thought, but you will sound smarter and more prepared if you pause than if you use a filler. It seems counterintuitive, but it works.

Very good points. One question - any advise how to deal with people who "borrow" your presentation, in other words, they interrupt, and start explaining the concepts for you. It could be out of good will, an attempt to "help", but it can definitely ruin the flow for you. I tend to counter-interrupt and continue, but wondering if there's better solution.
One question - any advise how to deal with people who "borrow" your presentation, in other words, they interrupt, and start explaining the concepts for you.

Luckily I haven't encountered this often. And on at least one or two occasions, when something like this has happened, it's actually been a positive in that the person was adding useful information that complemented what I was already saying. In that case, I don't mind letting them go on for a minute or two.

That said, at some point you have to take back over if you're going to get through your material. It's not in my nature to generally be rude or brusque with people, but sometimes you may have to force the issue a little. You might choose to intentionally wear a wristwatch just so you can do the gambit of "conspicuously look at your watch, and then interrupt and say something like 'OK, in the interest of time we need to get back to the main thread now. Perhaps we can have a follow-up conversation later on XYZ.'"

A common interjection as well is something like "This is good stuff, but we're getting a bit off-topic. If you want to talk about that in more detail, grab me after the talk and we can chat." Something like that.

At the start ask people to raise their hands if they have something to say, or make explicit points within the presentation for others to speak. If you're presenting on, say, a technical topic and the presentation (if in prose form) would have multiple sections, stop after each section and ask if anyone has anything to ask. Give them a chance to ask their question, and then take over again.

"What about X?" "Oh, that's actually going to be discussed in a few minutes." "What about Y?" "That's a good question but beyond the scope of this presentation, we can talk about that at the end if you'd like." "What about Z?" "Well, with Z ..."

But the critical thing is you only give them a chance to ask a question, and make that the format. Don't open it up to random side thoughts because then they will take over, "Well, actually with Foobar 3.0..." You've lost control at that point. If it's going to turn into a conversation between you and the person and will derail the presentation, move it to the end of the presentation.

Thank you for such a detailed response, this is really valuable. I would try to experiment and see what works for me.