[temp20100407]

Get a divorce attorney now, because you'll need one later.

For now, just because you're married doesn't mean you have to have complete sharing of finances. Get your finances completely separate. Create your own bank account; have your salary go there. Cancel any shared credit cards. Lock your credit report so new accounts cannot be made using your social security.

Then, offer to pay 1/2 the mortgage each month; or, better yet, let her pay the full amount from her own wages.