I think it’s safe to say you are an outlier if you can handle more than 4 infants or toddlers at once, either in terms of skill or acceptance of lower standards in levels of care.
You’re missing the point. Daycare costs are extremely high. Why? Precisely because of what souprock says and you are actually agreeing with him. It’s not uncommon for it to cost the full pay of the mother for two kids, especially if they are infant/toddler as you say. But it is extremely uncommon for a family to have 4 kids toddler and under. Because kids grow up. So raising kids in a family instead of in a daycare is far more efficient, (ignoring for a moment all the other obvious benefits) and the cost is correspondingly lower.
Thus, balancing the budget in the context of having children often means skipping the absurd costs of daycare.
Obviously costs are lower in a situation where you don’t have to pay for labor compared to a situation where you have to pay for labor.
I inferred souprock’s initial comments as daycare costs being too high due to government regulations requiring excessive labor for childcare, and my comments are to show that the regulations are not excessive, or at least not anything out of the norm compared to parents who stayed home (I don’t know anyone who can handle 4 infants by themselves).
And balancing the budget also includes the present value of future income that can be earned by a parent that stays home during toddler years versus one that continues to work and pays for daycare. Clearly, many people are betting that even the high costs of daycare are worth paying in exchange for the (increased) security of future cash flow from working.