[diob]

This is quite a privileged comment. Please realize that not everyone has the luxury to up and leave.

This person might have tons of obligations, such as bills to pay, family to take care of, and depending on their location not much mobility to just "find a new job". It's weird to just discount an entire person's life and pretend there's such an easy solution they're not taking.

What's more, it reeks of survivorship bias. There's likely a good chunk of folks who have done what you did but failed (either due to bad luck, or something else). What's more, the price of failure differs for everyone. Some have family to fall back on, others have friends, and others have a societal safety net.

Empathy is hard, but please try and think about how your situation is likely not the norm. By all means feel free to give advice, but try to leave out anecdotal assumptions. Strive to be aware that not everyone has the same opportunities or outcomes, even with the same inputs. It sucks, but that's just life, as you said.

[francis-io]

In my first paragraph I mentioned that if it was not possible to make this situation happen then at least not work towards it. Everyone should be able to put 10% of a salary away into savings to work on getting the freedom to do this.

If we assume a tech skill set, more and more jobs are becoming fully remote, making location not so much of an issue.

As for survivorship bias, I feel like you are somewhat right. I actually got into this type of work due to getting fired, so I was already at a low point with not much to lose.

As for empthay, that's exactly what I have and why I made this comment. I'm for the most part totally anonymous here. I don't have many posts or any kind of reputation. I put the time into making the comment because I truly belive that people can benefit from the change in mindset. I have nothing to gain, all I want to do is help people find the kind of freedom from oppressive working situations that I found.

We have all had struggles in our career, and some more than others, but the ones that succeed over the long term usually have the ability to self evaluate and look internally, rather than give an excuse why they can't do something.

[diob]

I appreciate you taking the time to reply, I want you to know I'm not trying to attack you, just expand your mindset.

It's very common for others to attribute their own failures to something outside their control, but look at others and attribute those people's failures to things inside their control. They also do the opposite for successes. Which I suppose in my own way, I might be doing to yours. But do know I think your success likely took both hard work and luck, and without the hard work it would have likely not panned out.

I disagree that everyone "should be able to put 10% away". It's simply not possible for everyone, and even if they do emergencies happen (car breaks down, sickness, etc.). Once again, you're speaking from a realm of opinion and not reality.

I don't think anyone would disagree that mindset is important, and continuing to try and persevere is important as well. But I do think folks disagree on it always panning out in the end.

Even you, at one point in the future, either due to illness or misfortune, might end up needing more than a shift in mindset to survive or dig yourself out.

Empathy is about more than advice or optimistic mindsets, it's about realizing we should help each other, because sometimes things really are out of our control.

It's about listening to this person, really listening, and understanding their situation before offering platitudes.