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by rutthenut 1923 days ago
> I would create an unshakeable confidence that I knew what I was talking about

Is this self-confidence, making you feel you know what you are talking about?

Or do you think it convinced/conned the audience by using such as a dubious visual prop?

2 comments

I picked up the tenting-my-fingers from a boss I really admired -- he had both the technical-academic and the business-selling chops to the highest degrees. In my experience it does make people listen to you longer, even if you pause longer to think and so on. But this is likely to be culture-bound.
Was that boss Mr. Burns?[0]

Cant help but think of him when people do that. It’s also prescribed to people as a confidence-booster, so it makes me a little more skeptical of someone when they pull that, ‘specially with a contemplative pause.

[0] https://images.app.goo.gl/AerFJgpZVkiE8rrf7

Hmm funny, but that link hijacked my back button. As I clicked BACK for the third time, I imagined the programmer of the page looking contentedly down on me from above, with tented fingers...

Ok so surely "contented" isn't anything to do with finger tents?! ... Apparently it's from the Latin contentus, from continere "to hold together, enclose".[1]

"Sense connection of "contained" and "satisfied" probably is that the contented person's desires are bound by what he or she already has"

That does sound more than accidentally related to hand-tenting! You are actually displaying your enclosure, your container.

https://www.etymonline.com/word/content

[1] Spanish has "contener" – to contain, include, control, repress, hold back. Corresponding to contentus is "contenido" – contained, held back, (noun) contents, (adj) reserved, restrained.

It might be. I bumped into this last week and I found it fascinating. Long to short, your body language not only affects how others perceive you, it affects how you perceive you.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ks-_Mh1QhMc&fbclid=IwAR0GQpiN7...

That aside, I'm reading Adam Grants "Think Again." He mentioned at least one study where appearing infallible can be a bad thing. That you can become less believable, less likeable and so on. There's more to influencing others than coming across as Mr / Ms Know-it-all. Showing too much confidence can work against you.