[pvaldes]

> I don’t know how we can expect someone like this to be a good parent.

You either are or not. My bet would be that the parent is fully aware, but ashamed and in denial about the situation.

A busy mother is still a mother. Should know when their son is lying. She could be tricked for a month, for one year maybe, but when 4 entire years passed and she claims that didn't suspected anything... either she barely talks in the dinner with the boy about his day or she carefully circumnavigated the theme and don't really wanted to know the details of his education.

And some parents just don't like the school system. I know a case of a divorced mother that deliberately boycotted the education of her daughter repeatedly asking her to be at home so she didn't feel alone. The outraged school wanted to do a point and the truant girl had to repeated several years, with the same outcome and less effort put on it each year. Everybody, was relieved when she eventually reached the legal age, was dumped from the school, show the middle finger to everybody and keep with their former life (Partied hard, socialized a lot, found a partner and married). We could say that she is doing fine, in fact.

[cannabis_sam]

>You either are or not.

This is a lie you tell yourself to be able to continue to look down on people.

In the real world, people are affected by their circumstances, regardless of whether they have the ability to change them.

[pvaldes]

> This is a lie you tell yourself to be able to... (unrelated bad thing, you should be ashamed, blah, blah, blah...).

Not, this is a dichotomy covering all the possible outcomes, thus can't be a lie, by definition.

Some people are good parents, other are terrible at parenthood. Where is the lie in my statement? There are millions of examples.

If your son failed the school for four years, failed in ALL classes, didn't learn anything in your face, and you are clueless about that, don't blame other people. You have a responsibility in this train crash. You must calm down, do damage control and exercise more the communication part in your parenthood. You can be busy and tired, but this is no excuse for not showing the slighest interest for your boy's life, future plans, interests, or education. Not at this level.

Being a good parent is more than being just a food providing machine.