[Houston]

If you're trolling, fuck you.

But, if not, my mom is a psychiatric nurse and currently works at a behavioral health hospital & I would be more than willing to forward this message onto her to get her opinion on whether what you're explaining can be diagnosable and treated with pharmaceuticals.

As for the depression, I've been there. I just recently stopped taking Zoloft for bouts of depression that I've had for most of my life, but didn't realize until I finally hit rock bottom.

At the least, you should see a psychiatrist and request to be put on antidepressants. However, there is a slight chance it may increase your suicidal thoughts, so if you decide to go this route to quell the depression, you will need to closely monitor your thoughts and contact your psychiatrist if you feel like you want to kill yourself.

That being said, like I said before, I just recently stopped taking my antidepressants. They helped pick me up, but I wouldn't be where I am today (copywriter for a rapidly expanding Internet marketing company in Tempe, AZ) if I didn't dive head first into something I was passionate about (i.e writing foremost, and all things tech, second).

So, you should sit down and write down a list of all the things you like to do. Make it comprehensive. Then go through it one-by-one and ask yourself whether you could wake up every day happy to go into work to do whatever item is on your list. Ask yourself whether you'd feel accomplished and good about what you do. Put a check mark next to those you answer in the affirmative to and then go through the check marked items and narrow it down until you find 1 to 2 things that you are super passionate about.

Once you find those, start mapping out a way to secure jobs in those areas. Whatever you do... don't sit at home and seclude yourself. Seclusion, in my book, will 100% lend itself to suicide if it continues for long enough.

Sorry for the long-winded response, but I've been in your position to an extent and I have a friend who suffers from bipolar 2 and he hasn't sought help and he continues to spiral downwards. If I can, I'd like to play some part in helping you get back on your feet.

If you want to talk, hit me up at [e-mail]. I'll respond whenever I get the chance.