[mathattack]

Burnout hits everyone differently. For me the biggest sign of burnout is Sunday night anxiety. I need new challenges (and recognition from those I respect) to get over it. Everyone is different though.

Specific to your case, don’t underestimate the impact of COVID. It’s natural to question things when you go through a life altering disease. And you’re supposed to be exhausted.

If you have a good boss with whom you have mutual respect, talk to them. Don’t wait for them to ask. If not, quietly look into your Employee Assistance Program. You don’t want to get stuck while you are getting over this.

You’ve put in 20+ good years into your career and got sucker punched by a disease. This is not your fault!!!

[burned_out]

I can relate to Sunday night anxiety. But I wouldn’t blame this on the disease alone. I’ve been feeling this for some time. I think it was just the last drop.

Impossible deadlines, unclear requirements, time logging literally every task over 15 minutes, constant emergencies, etc. have been eroding my mental health for years now...

The sad thing is that I know it’s not much different in most other places here (I am in south-east Europe, outside EU). At least I get paid decently here. But is it worth it. I don’t know. Just thinking out loud.

[childintime]

Maybe, just maybe, you've been putting off getting a life for too long. May sound snarky, excuse me, but this is related to the grandparent mentioning new challenges. Maybe you've taken a recipe to life, instead of living it. Maybe your put in an effort to follow (your own) rationalizations (like money), seeded by dominant patterns, instead of relating to what's good, socializing with what's good, finding out what's good and empowering what's good. Which would, partly, mean starting from scratch.

Note that you can't buy the answers to these questions with money. They may also turn out to be so elusive, as society has seemingly no use for them, that you'll end up going back to the job, kinda defeated, but with a new appreciation of purpose.

Or maybe I'm just suggesting things here, and you should ignore me and watch the [best movie on the topic](https://youtu.be/P9-FCC6I7u0?t=79) and explore the insanity on display. Sorry.

[burned_out]

There are some valid points there. Not sure if it is related to the issue. Maybe.

[neuronic]

This sounds like a terrible way to work and like an unbelievable nightmare to me. Are you willing to trade income for a more relaxed job?

I am asking because I do believe that a healthier relationship with your job is absolutely worth the salary cut long term. I have already seen and heard plenty cases were people just dropped to 30ish hours/week rather than working full 37.5h or 40h (and obviuously all of the overtime that just... occurs).

I think finding a sweet spot quality of life is really important. I am completely content at this instance in time and have no desire to make my work life more stressful for more money because I don't need it. I have everything I desire, including an SO I care for more than "the next level" at work. It's not that I am not ambitious but I have seen jobs wreak havoc on people's lives with nearly nothing in return to show for it (aside from shit you don't need).

Work is never worth more than you need to feel content. You're not going to make serious money slaving away for some corp anyway. Assuming you're a normal employee, use vacation days and call in as sick as often as you truly need it because you're not gonna help your team/project being frustrated and burned out.

Health is more important than some corp's bottom line. You can power through shit at 22yo but even at 32yo your body will make itself known quicker than one would expect. I mean you must know better than me. No product releasing tomorrow is worth breaking your mental or physical health over!

You're not really going to get more than a fishy handshake once you leave for whatever reason - even if you shouldered 80% of the weight for 10 years.

Also, you apparently amassed decades of experience - leave before you break if you can't make it work. You're worth something on the market. You will find a job with healthier conditions. Maybe less salary or whatever but again - unless you really depend on the money I'd rather take a cut here in favor of health.

[burned_out]

All on point. Changing jobs, scaling down is something I can’t seem to agree on with my SO.

[voisin]

Can you elaborate? What are the concerns expressed by your SO?

[burned_out]

It would be a big change - we’d have to sell our home because we would not be able to pay the mortgage. My current salary is almost double that of any offer I was able to get. I’ve talked to many developers in the area and it’s basically the same thing, just for less money.

All that for what? Because I am bored or demotivated.

Those are all valid concerns. It is a risk I am not willing to take without her full support.

[mathattack]

A tough job situation doesn’t make it easier. It may not exclusively be COVID but it contributes. Mental and physical well being influence each other.

Take care of yourself!