[throwaway_pdp09]

for some reason you omitted the sleazier half of the title "...and influence people".

Improving social skills and using them manipulatively are entirely different things. If you've ever known or worked with psychopaths you'll get that immediately. I suppose there's a continuum but still.

[monsieurbanana]

I don't agree. Influencing and social skills cannot be dissociated. Making friends is the process of making a person like you, which seems to fall under the definition of influence.

As many things, influencing people isn't inherently bad, but depends on how and why.

[brtkdotse]

Have you read the book? It’s very far from being sleazy or manipulative, but rather a guide to what people tend to think are agreeable qualities.

[throwaway_pdp09]

Fair enough, I have not and was going on hearsay, but from wikipedia "As time passed however, scholarly reviews became more critical, chiding Carnegie for being insincere and manipulative" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_to_Win_Friends_and_Influen...)

And it also says "Charles Manson used what he learned from the book in prison to manipulate women into killing on his behalf" but I don't know if that can be blamed on the book.

[dvtrn]

I have not and was going on hearsay

This is unfortunate.