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by WA9ACE
2031 days ago
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I experience much the same things GP does and I like to take a stab at replying to some of your fears. It would have been perfectly acceptable to my circle of family and friends to say that I and my wife would not have kids. Having children is not for everyone, especially those that are afraid of losing their personal time. I definitely miss the amount of personal freedom and time I had on my hands before and kick myself for not realizing at the time how much personal time I had, not that it would have changed my behavior, but to just have appreciated what I had at the time more fully. Having said all of that nothing compares to the joy my son brings me every day, and there's no amount of crying and fighting he could do that would make me yearn for the time before his existence. For those on the fence, I would say it is better to not have children if you're uncertain. Having children should feel like a leap of faith that you're ready to take together, not one you feel you have to take despite your fear because of a biological clock or possible regret. Everything in life has a season, and you will go through many seasons. I only get 1 year with my 2 year old. Then I'll only get 1 year with my 3 year old. The seasons of life will come again (hopefully) when I have more free time and my son pursues his own passions in life. The time I spend playing with him while my partner cooks dinner, or that my partner spends with him while I clean the dishes is fleeting as is all of life. I'll blink and he'll be a grown man and I'll have all the free time in the world again. Live for today, and hope for tomorrow. If you want all of your todays and tomorrows to be yours and your partner's to enjoy with each other only, the choice to not have children easy. I chose to experience fatherhood and was privileged to make that choice without pressure either way and with my partner's support. Live life exactly how you want and be kind. |
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