[openfuture]

Weird. I've been to Iran and had many discussions about this custom 'taarof' except(!) it is my _northerner_ custom... no Iranian mentioned they had the same culture and I'm sure someone would have! I talked to kids, expats and others who wouldn't hide such facts.

Where I am from a host is obligated to offer a traveler all they can, even if it means they won't survive the winter, the traveler is obligated to decline since it could be that his acceptance of such offerings will starve (kill) his hosts come winter.

My insistence on declining kind offers was considered quite rude and I got called out for it a few times, prompting such discussions, absolutely no one ever at any point in time mentioned that there was such a custom in Iran.

There seemed to be a universal acknowledgment that the Iranian custom was the opposite; you should accept all offerings and leave leftovers to signal you are done eating because if you finish your food and refuse more it suggests that your host is poor which slights them.

Idk if this conspiracy you describe will explain away my experience but just figured I'd share for other readers.