[eyelidlessness]

Of course! I don’t even have enough information to dislike you. Honestly when I see comments like yours I assume the experience is one of cultural exposure and subconscious bias unless I see otherwise. I grew up in a place (Virginia) where (for instance) racism was so much a part of the fabric of everyday life that I didn’t recognize a lot of my own biases. I just thought they were common sense. I didn’t have a framework for thinking of systematic bias, so I started from the assumption that equality is the default absent obvious inequality. And “obvious” was of course experiential and educational, so I didn’t see what my (for instance) Black neighbors considered normal and I didn’t understand how their experience informed their reactions to (for instance) police.

Moving to another place (Seattle) where (for instance) racism is still a part of the fabric of everyday life but a part of the social discussion was challenging as I was introduced to ideas that felt unintuitive. But empathy helped me grow and understand more than I did, and helped me value and pursue that growth.

It also helped me recognize (for other instances) I had unconsciously internalized other biases. I had rejected my own sexuality (I identify queer, demisexual) and my gender identity (I accept he/him/they/them pronouns equally).

I hope a little empathy goes far for you. It’s not often in a followup like this I see someone willing to reciprocate the empathetic spirit and acknowledge a contrary view kindly. Who knows where it’ll take you, but I hope you’ll consider that your experience may be coloring your ideas and that you may have room for other ideas in that consideration.